Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Snake Report: Day Seven


A spider tried to eat me today. It was absolutely terrifying.


Every time I think I've rationalized how this world works, I find myself ignorant. The creatures in this cave are more than just living things- they're monsters. Legitimate monsters that defy the known laws of my previous reality.

But, I have good news to report as well. Perhaps this could already be guessed, as I'm not dead.


The good news is: Spiders hate fire quite a bit.

As in, fire kills them.

Really, really kills them.

Spider, spider webs, spider egg sacks: The whole nine yards. All are extremely flammable.

Category 1 Flammable-Solid. "Keep away from heat, sparks, open flames, and hot surfaces. No smoking."


Yes, all of those statements are relevant, and OSHA approved.

I'll take on the personal responsibility for this misadventure. When trying to gobble down a few more mushrooms from Frog's Pillar I put myself a bit to far out into the open. Apparently I look like a tasty morsel to a hunting spider. It cleared the distance between us before I even knew it was on approach. Instinct can take the credit for this round of survival: Human-side was in full shock and terror, but Snake-instinct fought against the terror and managed to barf up a pitiful excuse for [Fire-breath] along with half a toasted mushroom.

Pitiful, but effective.

The spider ran off an eight-legged BBQ, before curling up and dying with a smolder of defeat.

[Fire Breath] is now rank III, just like that.



[Current: Level Six]


If spiders still didn't terrify the ever-living shit out of me, I think this would probably be the start of a grinding montage. They do though.

They really do.

I'm sticking with glowing blue mushrooms for now.